The heaviest element known to science is managerium. The element has  
no protons or electrons but has a nucleus composed of one neutron,  
two vice-neutrons, five assistant vice-neutrons, 25 pro  
vice-neutrons and 125 assistant pro vice-neutrons all going round in  
circles. Managerium has a half-life of three years at which time it  
does not decay but institutes a series of reviews leading to  
reorganization. Its molecules are held together by means of the  
exchange of tiny particles known as morons.